Here's me thinking 'Do I really have to write a post on this? Can't I just enjoy my macch?'
Part one- in which our protagonist feels somewhat out of sorts
It was the strangest thing. I was walking home from uni one day when I suddenly couldn’t walk straight. The world was spinning, I couldn’t get my balance no matter how I tried. The footpath just kept swinging towards me.
As I was almost home I hunched my back, gritted my teeth and stumbled the few blocks I had left. I crashed out on my bed for an hour in the dark, then talked myself into making dinner as I do every day. You’re fine, I told myself, who needs to keep their balance anyway?
Over the next few days, the collection of random symptoms I had just seemed to grow and grow; mind-numbing headaches, blurred vision, photosensitivity, back pain, dizziness, vertigo, depression, anxiety, fatigue and memory loss. I suffer migraines, these were not migraines (although I originally thought they were) – I couldn’t stand light and the pain was literally like being repeatedly clubbed in the head with a large flounder. The worst part was extreme what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-me panic.
I couldn’t attend uni or work, I got reading glasses, was prescribed migraine meds, took enough painkillers to knock out a whale and spent weeks in bed before my fabulous doctor diagnosed a b12 deficiency. ‘Phew, no big deal.’ said every single person I told. Yeah, you might say that, except that left unchecked, it can lead to subacute degeneration of the spinal cord.
Part 2 – in which our protagonist has an epiphany
While I was sick, I was visiting my brother, who is a musician working a minimum wage job. I was so inspired by his work ethic when it came to his music, his creativity and his commitment to what is basically unpaid work. Both my brothers are musicians, totally self taught, always with multiple, self-directed projects on the go. It was while lying in the dark on a half-deflated air mattress in my brother’s spare room listening to him doing whatever the hell you do when you make electronic music that I really started to think about my own life. At this point, squinting out of one eye, reading food blogs to pass the time I thought ‘They are doing something, they are MAKING something. What can I make?’
Part 3 – In which our protagonist engages in storming of the brain
Since I didn’t know what was wrong with me and could barely get out of bed, I vowed I’d make something of this knack with words people often accuse me of. I decided to set myself a simple task – put together a food blog, blog once a week.
I knew I’d always eat, hell, I knew I’d always cook – I cooked that first day I lost my balance. I knew I’d always have an opinion about food. So I curled up on that air mattress with my eeepc and devoured all the blogs I love, be they about food or not, and I wrote a list for each one of everything I liked and everything I didn’t like about them. Then I wrote a list of everything I could think of that I loved to cook. Then I began to write.
Part 4 – In which our protagonist becomes unimaginably rich doing what she loves
This is actually true, if you take ‘rich’ in the extremely abstract sense. I have been blogging for exactly 1 year. It has enriched my life more than I could ever have imagined.
This is not to say that every time I sit down to write a post or duck into a café to snap away at my coffee, I’m excited to do so. In fact, quite the opposite; when I sit down to wrote a post, I dread it – I can’t be bothered and I worry that what I write will be rubbish. When I pop into a coffee shop to take pictures, I know people will stare and my coffee will get cold.
But the sum total of my experience blogging far exceeds the stress of putting together each idividual post. The bloggers I have met, both in person and online. The business and café owners that have welcomed me into their establishments like a long lost relative would welcome you into their home. Attending that blogging conference everyone’s talking about. And most of all, the way it feels to make something, create something, and to always have it there. No matter how lame the rest of your life may get sometimes, you’ll always have that thing you made.
When I started Corridor Kitchen, this was literally my thought process: I will start a blog. It will give me something to do. Hopefully I won’t die.
But now my goal is to make Corridor Kitchen as much of an inspiration as the blogs I love and am inspired by. If even one person is as inspired by my blog as I am by the blogs I was reading, squint-eyed lying on the floor of my brother’s spare room one year ago, then I consider Corridor Kitchen a success.
What about you? Why do you blog? Why do you read blogs?
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What a journey! Well, you know why I blog… like you, I wanted to do something productive with my life. And I read blogs because they entertain, inspire, and move me. Here’s to many more years of great blogging!
leaf (the indolent cook) recently posted…french lettuce, carlton
My dad is a chef so I always had a lot of good food cooked for me at home. I didn’t develop an interest in cooking until I moved out and realised that I wouldn’t have all this amazing food to eat unless I learnt to cook it myself. So I learnt to cook from my parents and used my blog as a way to note down recipes (like my own online cookbook). Having a blog also motivates me to cook more as I need to update. I love it when my friends or random people tell me that I they cooked one of my recipes. Blogging has also lead me to meet other like minded people which has been great.
I agree about what you say that blogging is a great feeling as you create something that will always be there
I mainly read blogs for recipe ideas and to find out places to eat.
Blue Apocalypse recently posted…Reflections on Eat Drink Blog 2011
Well, I’m very glad you didn’t die and you started the blog. I too feel like I’m creating something by blogging – it gives some creative outlet to me which I certainly don’t get in my day job.
Miss Piggy recently posted…The Pickle Guys, New York
Me too! That sums it up exactly! (both the not dying and the creating)
I have no simple explanation why I spend up to 25 hours each week infront of the computer. I can see where those hours go but all I can think of is that it’s a bit of an obsession. It’s a hobby, it’s my life … at this point in my life. When I’m old and decrepid struggling to pick up a DSLR (or whatever they may be in 50 years) as well as struggle to sit on an aircraft for more than 5 hours, at least I know I have a badly written record of my mid-life eating adventures.
Blogging urges me to get out there and try places more than I ordinarily would and has introduced me to like-minded people. I may not get out & socialise with bloggers as much as others but I do love the fact that I’m not the only freak out there.
Lauren, just don’t vanish from the Sydney blogsphere. You’ve added an element to it that nobody else has.
john@heneedsfood recently posted…Cheeky Czech – Newtown
To me, the fact that you can’t explain why you do it makes it even more important that you keep at it. It doesn’t come so naturally to me, I have to force myself to sit down at the computer and write, edit photos, whatever. But then I see something someone else is creating and I get inspired all over again.
Like you, I love that blogging is taking me out to discover new places. It really started for me when I began visiting places I’d read about in blogs.
Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.
Dear Lauren,
Thank you for writing with such honesty about why you blog.
I’ve only been blogging for just over 5 months but I am obsessed by it. It feeds me creatively, emotionally and intellectually. I can use so many different skills I have and am developing so many more.
Creating each recipe, each review, each story and each post is a wonderful journey – and I never know quite where I’m going to end up when I start.
And I agree – the people you meet through blogging is a wonderful bonus. I am so glad I attended Eat Drink Blog and was able to meet people like you – I feel like I found ‘my people’ in that room – instant kindred spirits.
I can’t imagine my life without blogging now. Isn’t that how one defines love?
Don’t ever stop blogging, Lauren. You have a gift for writing. Keep sharing it.
I was drawn in instantly by your mention of your symptoms of B12 deficiency – they almost exactly mirror the symptoms that have me seeing a neurologist next week -I will be sure to have them do blood work before any invasive scans or some such – that for sharing your journey!
deb from ps bohemian recently posted…Fat Discrimination is NOT a Good Thing
Great post, it’s always interesting to know what’s behind a blog. Hope that your migraine problems are a thing of the past. I started blogging as a way to keep memories from fading, and then discovered that is very therapeutic especially if you hate your job
Gaby recently posted…Food And Health The Way Evolution Intended, a Primal seminar
I identify with that. I don’t hate my job, but I don’t have job security at this point in my life. So it’s kind of nice to have something constant.
I think that everyone that blogs gets there for their own unique reasons. What I didn’t expect when I started blogging a few years ago is that I was not only blogging but joining a community, which I love.
Sara (Belly Rumbles) recently posted…Butterfinger Blondies Recipe
I guess that is the million dollar question that all bloggers should try to answer. I made it a point to establish that when I first started blogging 7 months ago and use it as a guiding principle to help me. So far, it has enabled me to blog about things that I’m truly passionate about and that makes a big difference. Whether it publishing a simple post of having coffee, if it matters to you, you ought to do it and don’t let others judge you for it.
Interesting post Lauren and I hope you continue to blog. I blog because I love communicating with people. I can’t stop doing it, it’s a part of me and even when I am offered a night off from blogging I can’t help but pick up the camera and start writing.
Lorraine @ Not Quite Nigella recently posted…Chocolate Crunch Cake & Making Your Own Xmas Hamper
Why blog? When I started 7 years ago (a late starte to blogging) it was to write down all those “we should write a book” moments that happen at work.
It is sort of like keeping a diary, with the discipline of other people reading, to keep one on track. I’ve never gone hawking for, or seeking readership.
Then I began more recently a photo blog, to hone my writing skills, however my pre-existing blog is probably better written, being written anonymously.
And then I had a tiff with my law firm, which turned into a series of about 70 short blog style posts. Out of nowhere this garnered a readership of 10,000 people. I became so scared that it would be recognised by someone from real life, even though written anonymously, with all names & places changed, & even the peripheral details changed.
But I never seek readers, though am happy should anyone go & have a look at either of my blogs.
Steve recently posted…Right Behind You!
[…] having what feel like b12 deficiency headaches – funny story, if it weren’t for them, Corridor Kitchen would not exist. So I feel I only need one espresso machine rather than two (I already owned one when this baby […]